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Why Mom is Brain-Dead

Modified: Aug 18, 2021 · This post may contain affiliate links · 44 Comments

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...Or Why 27/6 is the new 24/7

The other evening, my husband and I looked at each other across the dinner table with one of those looks that contains a whole conversation in a single eyebrow. Here's how the conversation went:

Husband: Are they always like this?

Me: Yes! Why do you think I'm so tired at the end of the day?

What his eyebrow was referring to was the constant barrage of questions coming at us from both sides of the table. Both kids were peppering us with question after question, seemingly at random, and without pause. This is normal.

After our silent eyebrow conversation, I said out loud, "I've often wished I had one of those palm clickers that umpires carry so they can count things." He laughed, knowing I meant that would be the only way to keep track of how many questions came at us in an evening. He said, "You could do it the old fashioned way, with a pen and paper."

At that, our oldest, who can't stand to be left out of a conversation, piped up, "What are you talking about? What's a clicker? And what do you need pen and paper for?"

See what I mean? Rapid fire like that. All. Day. Long.Questions

I hopped up, grabbed my grocery list, a pen, and my kitchen timer. I started it immediately and put down three tally marks for the questions she had just asked as I said, "Nothing honey, I'll tell you tomorrow." Then I proceeded to discretely make tally marks for each question that came at us from both girls. After a few minutes it was time to get baths going, so I turned off the timer and added up the marks. There were 27 (and I'm being conservative because I'm pretty sure a couple got past us before we marked them) and the timer read "6:00". As in minutes. Twenty Seven questions in 6 minutes.

The math is pretty simple. If you extrapolate that number out a bit, it means 270 questions in an hour. Over the course of a normal day (given one hour together in the morning before school, and 6 hours between school and bedtime in the evening) that adds up to...wait, I'm getting my calculator out...1,890 questions. And on the weekends it's worse. All that time together. All those questions. I'm tired just thinking about it. This is why I look forward to 8am on Monday mornings. I send the kids off to school and look around my empty house. So quiet. No one wants anything, no one wants to know anything. Just blessed silence.

Obviously not all the questions are difficult to answer, or require much thought, but they can't go unanswered because then I just get more questions. "Mom, did you hear me? Do you know? What would happen if we gave Gigi (the guinea pig) chocolate strawberries? Suddenly one innocent pet care question has turned into three.

People use the phrase "24/7" to mean "every hour of every day" or "at all times" but I'm thinking of campaigning (at least with my other mommy friends) to change the reference to "27/6" because at our house the only constant is the questions. So I hereby deliver to you today the new vocabulary convention of "27/6" which I'm sure will quickly make its way into the urban dictionary.

In honor of this momentous event, I am proud to bring you a sampling of some of the more brain-draining questions that come up in our daily life.

  • "Mommy, what does the word 'toxic' mean?"
  • "Mom, do things ever go wrong in surgeries?" (This was on the eve of her surgery to remove her adenoids.)
  • "Mommy, how do giraffes become boys or girls?"
  • "What are 'genetics'? (The follow up to my evasive answer of the previous question.)
  • "Mom, what is protein?"
  • "Mommy, what if we had these little things that went around our heads, that had flowers on them and were sort of stretchy and sort of not stretchy?" (This was accompanied by a lot of gestures which did nothing to help me understand the concept.)
  • "What does it mean to be a 'newlywed'?"
  • "Mommy, can I still believe in mermaids, even if I know that the tooth fairy is really you?"
  • And my personal favorite...""What does 'completely speechless' mean?"

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Comments

  1. Rena McDanielR says

    April 18, 2014 at 8:56 am

    I remember those days for sure! I kind of miss it...sipping coffee...okay maybe not! Good Luck Meredith!

    Reply
    • Meredith Wouters says

      April 18, 2014 at 7:47 pm

      I know someday I'll miss these days, but for now I just miss my brain! 🙂

      Reply
  2. Ashley @ 3 Little Greenwoods says

    April 18, 2014 at 12:31 pm

    Oh my gosh! Honey and I had the same conversation last week! He asked "are they like this all day long?!" too.

    Reply
    • Meredith Wouters says

      April 18, 2014 at 7:48 pm

      That's awesome! Glad I'm not the only one.

      Reply
  3. Jeri Walker-Bickett (@JeriWB) says

    April 18, 2014 at 2:50 pm

    My nephew Jake used to wear me out with his trademark: "Just one more question please."

    Reply
    • Meredith Wouters says

      April 18, 2014 at 7:51 pm

      I'm sure his parents appreciated having someone to share the load! Aunts and uncles are the best!

      Reply
  4. Johanna says

    April 19, 2014 at 8:32 am

    To take the side of the kids (since I'm not a parent and don't feel exhausted every day), I think questions are fantastic. I love the sense of wonder and curiousity they exude. I love that they don't think they know everything. I love that they still think they might be able to know everything if they just ask enough questions. I love that they think you know all the answers. I kinda wish I had someone to ask questions of (that wasn't google) and that I could infuse my tired adult brain with some excitement of discovering the unknown around me.

    Reply
  5. Johanna says

    April 19, 2014 at 8:32 am

    PS--sorry you're brain dead.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 21, 2014 at 4:00 pm

      Actually, I've been brain dead for a while, it's just nice to have someone to blame it on now! I do love that they are curious and enthusiastic. Abby has stopped taking "I don't know" for an answer. Now she just goes and gets me my phone so I can google it. Darn google.

      Reply
  6. themomcafe says

    April 19, 2014 at 10:01 pm

    This is HILARIOUS!! And SOOOO TRUE!! I swear i can't for the life of me even TRY to silence the questions... and you can then add all the meltdowns, the whining, and the arguments the kids get into fighting over who said what and who gets what and why so and so has more attention and and and...

    My daughter got her adenoids out too. Btw. 😉

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 21, 2014 at 4:01 pm

      Thank you! I'm so glad to know I'm not alone! We brain-dead moms gotta stick together or the kids will run us right over. 🙂

      Reply
  7. William Butler (@wiarbu) says

    April 21, 2014 at 8:54 am

    Excellent story Meredith.
    Reminds me when my daughter was young she would incessantly ask WHY?
    I stopped that routine one day with the answer... Cuz they do it in California that way.
    I guess that was good enough for her. She never asked again.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 21, 2014 at 4:02 pm

      That is awesome Bill, I'll have to try it next time. I'll let you know how it goes...

      Reply
  8. jankedonna says

    April 21, 2014 at 4:11 pm

    This was funny. It reminded me of the days when my daughter and step-daughters were little> The questions came out of nowhere. of course, the toughest always seemed to be asked when we were in the vehicle driving somewhere.

    Reply
  9. Arleen says

    April 21, 2014 at 5:05 pm

    I know kids can drive you nuts with all their questions, but it is a positive that they are looking to you and your husband for answers. It will pay off when they are older and they know they can come to you both.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 8:54 pm

      That's true, Arleen. What a great way to look at it. Thanks for the reminder!

      Reply
  10. Susan Cooper/findingourwaynow.com says

    April 21, 2014 at 6:01 pm

    I laughed so hard tears ran down my face. I can so relate. Try that on a class of six year olds. It's like a symphony of voices all asking questions at the same time, not even hearing the others. It can boggle the mind and mangle the brain... LOL. 😀

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 8:55 pm

      Mangle the brain - I love it! I can think of few things more intimidating that a classroom full of 6 year olds.

      Reply
  11. Tim says

    April 21, 2014 at 6:52 pm

    I want to say that is very cute but I will stick with funny and only because I am looking in and not the one getting bombarded. Good thing for my mum I was never like that!

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 8:57 pm

      LOL Tim! I bet your mum might remember things differently...

      Reply
  12. Along Comes Mary says

    April 22, 2014 at 12:56 am

    Wow...we don't have kids yet & I think I will savor my time before I seriously think of kiddos! 😉 Too funny!!

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 8:57 pm

      Yes, enjoy the peace and quiet while you can!

      Reply
  13. Lenie says

    April 22, 2014 at 2:08 am

    You only have two - that's so easy - I raised seven - thanks for letting me know the reason I've never regained my sanity. Actually, this post is great and its wonderful how your kids know they can ask questions. Way to go Meredith.
    Lenie

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 8:59 pm

      Seven?!? OK, you have my undying respect and admiration. I'm glad to know it's survivable. Maybe I can survive two. 🙂

      Reply
  14. Sandy says

    April 22, 2014 at 6:24 am

    You certainly have your 'ears' full with the questions from your kids - the older I get the less patients I have - lol Glad your kids turn to you and your husband for guidance.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:01 pm

      Ears full - that's a good way to put it. I'm really glad they ask us, and despite my complaints, I hope they keep it up forever!

      Reply
  15. Paul Graham says

    April 22, 2014 at 8:39 am

    Meredith, I shall start using 27/6 without delay. Perhaps this is the origin of the saying "He has his mothers brains ..... fortunately I've still got mine "

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:03 pm

      Thanks Paul! If my children have their mother's brains, it will be because they took them from me!

      Reply
  16. niekkamcdonald says

    April 22, 2014 at 4:28 pm

    I remember those days lol. I would have to tell my son it's quiet time just so I could get a break for a few minutes. He would literally rapid fire questions at me and I couldn't answer them fast enough.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:04 pm

      I love quiet time! My kids have long since outgrown the need for it, but I still enforce it for my own sanity.

      Reply
  17. Christina says

    April 22, 2014 at 10:08 pm

    That's why moms spend a lot of time in the bathroom. But still, you get the knocking on the door and questions coming. I enjoy being fun Auntie because I can send them home at he end of the day 😉

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:05 pm

      There is no safe place in the house. They will find you. I'd love to be an aunt, that sounds like a lot of fun!

      Reply
  18. Greg Narayan (@gregnarayan) says

    April 23, 2014 at 11:44 am

    Sorry for your lack of peace during dinner. On the plus side, sounds like they'd be active bloggers.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:06 pm

      YES! Someday this will all pay off when they're supporting me in my old age on their thriving blogging careers.

      Reply
  19. Debra Yearwood says

    April 23, 2014 at 8:28 pm

    What I think is really funny is that I kept thinking there would be less questions as they got older. Boy was I naive. At thirteen and sixteen, if my kids are in the room they are asking questions. My oldest, like yours has never encountered a conversation he didn't want to be part of...at least between his father and I. 🙂 I know I'll miss it terribly when they are off on their own and no longer asking questions.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 23, 2014 at 9:07 pm

      Oh no! I was thinking we were getting close to the end of this phase! Oh well, I'd rather them ask me a million questions then to stop talking to me and wondering what they're thinking, especially as they get older. 🙂

      Reply
  20. Jay says

    April 24, 2014 at 4:27 pm

    LOL.. I can relate to this on so many levels. I have witnessed my kids talk to me about absolutely nothing and everything at the same time for 45 min straight. Hey it is better that they ask us the questions than get stupid answers from their friends.

    Reply
  21. Meredith says

    April 24, 2014 at 6:30 pm

    That's the truth. I'd rather them get their stupid answers from me! 🙂

    Reply
  22. Michele Harvey says

    April 25, 2014 at 11:39 am

    You obviously have inquisitive children. Asking questions is a sign of intelligence. How old are your children? When my children reached a certain age and would come to me with lots of questions, I would tell them to get on the computer, do a search, and find the answers themselves. Thank you. I enjoyed your post.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 29, 2014 at 1:45 pm

      Thanks Michele, I console myself with the idea that it's a sign of intelligence and healthy curiosity. 🙂 Don't know what we'd do without google and wikipedia!

      Reply
  23. Welli says

    April 26, 2014 at 10:25 am

    Lol meredfith. very true and interesting. Most of the questions, at some stage, start to be trick questions where your answer can nail you immediately so be careful. Also the last of your sample questions, the answer was simple. You would have said " exactly how I am now" lol.

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      April 29, 2014 at 1:46 pm

      So true Welli! I've walked into quite a few setups, which make me think my kids might be smarter than me already!

      Reply
  24. normaleverydaylife says

    June 13, 2014 at 6:34 am

    Hi Meredith,
    I included this in a post about laughing at parenting that went up on my blog last night. Thanks for making me laugh!
    Marie @ Normal Everyday Life

    Reply
    • Meredith says

      June 15, 2014 at 8:37 pm

      Thank you Marie! I'll go check it out. Glad it made you laugh...

      Reply

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I'm Meredith, the designer, crafter, and DIY-er behind The Palette Muse. I love all things colorful and creative, and I love sharing them with you. Thanks for visiting today!

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